6 miles

Having mentioned that I wanted to run 6 miles today, I didn't want to go back on that, even after having a long day at work. I came home, changed and went out the door before I had a chance to change my mind. It felt great to run and let all of the stress go that I have been feeling this past week. I'm always reminded of how running is one of my favorite stress relievers. Now that my bachelor's is behind me and I am full time at work, I shouldn't be getting as stressed. It feels amazing to be done! I have been blessed with 40 hours at work and day jobs keep coming up. Like today one of the owners called me up and wants me to wash two of her cars (she pays me 30 for each) and then I am going to help her clean out her storage unit on Thursday. I love it! I will make about 200 dollars on Thursday, since I work a 10 hour shift at work right after helping Bonnie.... Life is good!

Ether 12:27 One of my favorite scriptures

This is more of a diary kind of post than anything else. Consider yourself forewarned.

I hate not being able to convey what I am really feeling. I lack the words to express my thoughts and in so doing, annoy or frustrate those people close to me. Which frustrates me because they aren't understanding my feelings and I hate, hate, hate when people are mad or annoyed with me. Shouldn't people just GET what I am saying and why I feel that way? I feel like I'm failing when they don't, which only fuels my frustration. It turns normal conversations into arguments.

My feelings are honest. I am not making them up. So why is it so hard to communicate that without having the other people lose their patience with me? I am trying very hard to share my feelings and communicate with my family and close friends. That isn't something that I am great at. I can listen well and can give some great advice to others, but putting that into practice in my own life has proved difficult.

I get hurt easily. I wish I had a thick skin, but I don't. Especially when it comes to those I really care about. Pretending I am not hurt comes more easily than not being hurt, so the majority of the time I pretend to shrug it off while inside I am wanting to hide myself in a bathroom to cry. Reminds me of Elder Bednar's talk about taking offense. We have that choice, and we shouldn't take offense (this is where Chrys says, "because it isn't your fence to take.") But how do we change the feelings that naturally come to us?

Ether 12:27
And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.

I'm not perfect and my emotions are not either. I have a long way to go on them. I need people to have patience with me. But as I am constantly reminded, how far am I going to test that patience? Everyone has a limit. I know that Heavenly Father places certain people in our lives and that we are blessed with our family for a reason. We can help each other grow. I need to have patience with myself and not expect a change overnight. I need to be more humble. I need to have more faith.

You can't say I didn't warn you.

I got gorgeous flowers from Travis the other day :) They were unexpected and a very welcome addition to my day. It made me wonder during the day why he would ask me questions about when I went on rounds, how far my work was from town, etc, but I sure wasn't thinking that he was going to send flowers. And when the delivery lady showed up and gave them to me half hour before clocking out, I first thought they were for someone staying at the Shores and that I had to deliver them. Thankfully, I was the one receiving this beautiful bouquet! The lady asked me if it was my birthday or some other special day, and after I told her no, she said, well it is a special day now! She was very right :) Thank you!

Saul Memorial Run

The first pictures are of planting a tree at Saul's Memorial with Chayo and the boys. It was fun to see Poli willing to get dirty and work for once.

The last picture is of Bailey. It lookes like it has been photo shopped, but it was because I turned around really quick to take it and moved the camera while taking it. Surprise lol.

I was planning on running the 10K during for the run, but since I had to work and have only gone running a few times all month, decided the 5K was smarter for me. Talking with Chayo, Saul's wife, I found out that she wanted to run it, but was scared to participate by herself. She asked if I would run the 5K with her and I agreed. Funny how she didn't mention that she runs 6 miles everyday until 10 minutes before the race!!! I had already promised to run with her, but knew I was going to get my butt kicked. After a mile of sprinting, I told her she could keep going and that I had to slow down. Seriously, that lady can run. It was right after I told Chayo to keep going, that I saw my cousin Bailey with his hand on his chest and breathing really hard. His mom was taking pictures for the run, so he was by himself. I was fully aware that my time was not going to break any world records, so stopped and walked with him. I had him set goals for us. Jog to the third power pole, jog to the stop sign, etc. But jog to this kid meant sprint as fast as you can until you are gasping for air. By the end of the race I had him convinced that if you pace yourself, you will be able to run for longer distances. We finished in 37 minutes. He was fun and yes, crossed the finish line before me ;)

Housesitting...

I have found out that I don't like to housesit all by myself, up in the mountains. It has become my excuse not to go running, because who wants to go running in the mountains all alone?? Really, it is only 50% being up here, and 50% being stressed out with statistics. Thankfully, I will be done with all of my midterms tomorrow at 4:30!!

I have the 5K Saul Memorial Run on Saturday morning and I really need to get back in shape for it. I don't have high hopes for myself, but it would be great to beat my last 5K time. Saul's sister Teresa told me she would only run it if I ran it with her, so my time might not be completely depending on me. I want her to be able to participate in the run that is in her brother's honor, and I'm really excited for getting to help with registration, starting at 6:30 in the morning... Not.

Back into shape

Today I set up some goals for getting me back into shape in time to run the 10K. Now to just follow through with that plan! I ran a little over 3 miles today and it was ok. Definitely not my best time ever though. But ok.

I feel productive

These are some pictures of my lonely but interesting drive. The first one was with the bugs on the windshield so you could get a feeling for how I actually saw the scenery, and another out the window to enjoy that beauty of the dirt roads and red rock :)


I took two tests today in my stats class and it felt wonderful to finally have them out of the way. I feel like I am actually progressing now. What is even better is that I feel like I did well on them. Then when I got home I went running. It is a lot more enjoyable when there is someone on the phone with me :) Thankfully Travis was cool enough to go running "with" me and kept me company. It sure made the 4 miles of running and 1 mile of walking go by a lot faster. Next time we will have to test ourselves and start at the same time to see who finishes first ;)

A day for messed up plans and miscommunications

The title says it all. Anyone close to me knows that I am not the best communicator. That in itself can be a reason for messed up plans, but today, I am pretty sure I can claim innocence!

My plans today:

1000 study statistics
1200 run
1400 study statistics
1800 dinner
2000 study statistics
2100 relax :)

This is how my day actually went....

1000 start studying statistics
1100 get a text message asking me to go babysitting in an hour
1200 get another text message saying they didn't need me until 1315
1315 take the kids to the lake
1430 the little girl gets attacked by a duck. Yes. Attacked.
1700 go home and think about going for a run
1730 be Whit's pick-up truck driver for a half hour
1800 go to a banquet for Whit that is only supposed to last an hour
1900 I'm still at the banquet
2000 bored out of my mind at the banquet
2045 FINALLY leave the banquet!
2100 eat dinner
2200 relax, but that even got interrupted because of a surprise. That one I will take some blame for though.

I almost miss the days of not working where I could completely schedule out my whole day and know exactly what I was going to do. Almost.

The day of dead frogs

I went running this morning! It was kind of depressing because I realized how out of shape I got in 2 weeks of not running. During 3 miles of running I had to stop a couple times to walk because my lungs were closing up on me. Damn asthma. It sure felt good to run though. I found a few dead and bloated frogs on the route, and ended up finding another one in the lake when I went swimming. I'm glad Lake Chelan is so pure and clean that I could see it before I stepped on it. Gross.

Tomorrow :)

Many people tell me that I shouldn't say, "tomorrow I will ....." And I can see where to a point that is excellent advice. It isn't healthy to procrastinate. Yet today I am excited to say that tomorrow I start up my running again!!

We had a talk on dreams and goals in church today. He emphasized the need to align our will to God's and follow those worthy desires and plan for tomorrow. Of course, my favorite quote of his today was when he was talking about a new gene therapy (it tied into his talk...kind of) and then he said, "Now I don't know nothing about genes, except for the fact that they look good on a lot of women." Totally something I didn't expect this old man to say over the pulpit! It was awesome.

Now back to my thought...

I have a lot of dreams. I have also been blessed with the opportunity to follow many of them. There are still some that are unfulfilled, but I feel like I am doing what I need to be doing to achieve those goals as well. Only Heavenly Father knows the end result, and in the meantime that might scare me a little, but I am excited for the future. I know I have a great one, full of adventures, trials, accomplishments, learning periods, progress, love, waiting for me. Tomorrow.

I have the overwhelming urge to go watch Annie now.